Spring Break

So, I spent most of my time running and doing stuff. David and I managed to get the house clean. He did a lot outside and I spent time here and there cleaning and organizing. I also vented and had some good conversations with David. I finally felt free enough to vent about his mom to him. I didn't want it to be something that was a fight, but it was stuff that had to be said. The thing I feel best about was having him ask her about cleaning a bathroom. I've been slow to clean the bathrooms because it's something that my husband HAS NEVER HELPED ME WITH. I know that he really hates cleaning them and I can't stand a dirty one, so my OCD or whatever sends me over the edge to cleaning them. They are a gross and nasty thing to tackle and lately I've been VERY ANGRY about being the only one to clean a bathroom THAT EVERYONE uses. It's not like they urinate or defecate somewhere else. EXCEPT the dog...he's the one exception and that's on Michelle's list of to dos. So, I did tell David to ask his mother to pick ONE bathroom - don't care which one it is and be responsible for cleaning it. I said I will clean the one in our bedroom and which ever other one she doesn't clean. I think that's fair. If she were living in her own place she would have to clean her own toilet and this Ain't the FU**ING Ramada Inn!

Bryan had a really good time in his swim lessons with Dallin. I think he thinks that I didn't let him have much free time to play since the lessons were EVERY day...but he had a week of breakthroughs. He finally started riding his bike. If it was the last thing he did this year...it was going to be to ride that damn bike. He went to ITz...he went to a sleep over at Dallin's house and his mom made a belated Star Wars Yoda cake for him. I think it was too much because he has this bad "entitled" attitude and it's going to get him into trouble with his dad.

I read 3 trashy novels...what else...oh and baby and I took a water waddles class. He doesn't love it but he did pretty good 3 out of the 5 days considering this was his first class.

Finally, my cousin is staying with my parents to dry and try her hand for a third time at rehab. I'm not loving it because she's smoking in MY old bedroom and my mom has problems with her breathing. I'm going to say something to her because it's really annoying me and I love my cousin but she's worn out her welcome with everyone else...she better not take advantage of my parents!

Carla's kids

Carla's kids

How much have I written

I was thinking about my summer writing. Pitiful. Do I give myself a break since I have a 7mo. old at home? Do I let myself slide since my worthless sister in law dropped her 10 yr. old son off for almost a month - who made my life and Bryan's life miserable for most of the time? Do I get to whine that since Bryan broke his arm and we were stuck with the extra kid that I have been whiny - tired - and over all bleh? I still have a few weeks before school starts. I need to go swimming. I want to have some fun. I need to get a break from the baby...that's for sure. I think I need to take Bryan swimming for some alone time with my son. I think I gave up on the writing thing because no matter what ...there's always going to be something I Should be doing and there will never be enough time to spend to write everyday. I guess I have to figure out what is more important live with my priorities. So, I didn't write most days this summer. So what. I got some things done...and a lot of things that I wish I would get off my duff and just do...but I'm going to live with my choices and be happy that I had a summer at all! Now, if I could just take advantage of what's left of it then I'll have something to write about when I have to tackle that "what I did this summer essay". Okay, so I'm not 12 years old - but I need a good story to go back to school with.

So far I have the following;
fantasize about smacking my sister in law
fantasize about flying to the beach for a month sans kids
fantasize about all the things I said I was going to do but didn't this summer

relish the time I went to the hot springs at Mt. Princeton...make plans to do that again NEXT summer. (Make Jackie go with me next year!)

re-read the Harry Potter Deathly Hallows books and re-watch HP DH 1 & 2.

Make plans for NEXT summer - to include but not limited to the following:
sign Bryan up for guitar lessons next summer
sign Bryan up for SWIMMING lessons this fall and next summer
plan to make plans for ways to waste our summer.

Independence Day

This weekend I learned the History of the English Language in 10-:60 second snippets. Boy those french with their beef and venison and pork instead of cow, deer and pig. No matter how much lipstick you put on it...it's still a pig. Anyway, I knew that shpeel but not nearly as concise or pithy. I think I'll show it to the kids...we could analyze the different words that came from that influence and maybe think of some others. Might be fun. Hopefully, we don't get stuck on the Jutes and Angles or the Saxons. Rock on English-ites.

So, today is 4th of July. My sister in law started to tell some of her bullshit about why she didn't want to be with this guy Jacob. I just stood there making a bottle for the baby. I smiled at her and I didn't say one stinkin' word. I was upstairs putting the baby to sleep and to be honest...I prayed about WHAT to say to her. I wanted to yell at her and tell her where to get off, but I sat there looking at my son's baby quilt hanging in his room and I didn't know what I SHOULD say. What I wanted to do and should do were two very different things. Then, this afternoon, I went online and I wrote down EVERY single phone number and address for every shelter I could find. I didn't write down the ones that said no kids or men only...beyond that I wrote it down. I also wrote down the number and address for Peak Vista. Did you know that you can get free medical care and dental care. They schedule surgeries like once a month and I'm sure there's a waiting list but come on IT'S FREE MEDICAL AND DENTAL care. I had to pause when I saw that. My cousin Marci works at Peak Vista she said they're dead this time of year because they're next to a school, most people only bring their children there when school is in session. I think you have to be a resident of that school district (Harrison 2), but I digress. Anyway, David handed her the list of phone numbers and she said she had some lady's phone number in her purse. Later in the evening, I heard her mumbling into the phone. I don't know if she's talking to this guy that she was going to leave or someone else?? Who knows! Who cares. I don't know if she was expecting David to hand her a list of phone numbers and addresses for homeless shelters. I don't know if she really is going to go to a shelter or if she's bluffing. All I know is that I'm tired and I don't want the extra kids running through my house.

I feel like Bryan gets all jealous of anything Christopher gets and now I feel like when Christopher doesn't like what I'm telling him he goes to his mom to get the answer he wants. David told him to go to bed at 8:30 tonight. At 9:00 I shouted for them to brush their teeth and go to bed. Chris argued with me - I yelled BRUSH YOUR TEETH AND GO TO BED. He waited for his mom to come in from smoking...ugh...and she said just do it Christopher. I want to kick this kid in the A** soooooooo baddddddddddddd! Bryan now asks why every time I tell him to do something. He's going to get a kick in the keester and that's fer DA** sure.

Anyway, David said he's not feeling well. Felt sick. Makes me angry. I am NOT going to be left alone to deal with his sister and her kids bullshit. I have to cuss...yes...it's bullshit. I'm not going to do it. I just hope that she decides that this Jacob guy is better than a homeless shelter because I'm done. Oh look, her kids are asleep and she's out smoking at 11 at night. going back and forth-opening/closing the squeaky back door. If she wakes up the kid - I'm kicking her ass, David's ass and her little ones' ass just for good measure.

Her little one was punching her brother because he patted her on the head and she didn't like it. I grabbed her up and told her to say sorry - because we don't hit. I WANT to hit her kids...I didn't say I DID it...anyway, she saw momma - big ol' crocodile tears came out...I picked her up and said - oh no you don't. You're not getting out of this one. I said...say you're sorry and I'll let you down...I got the...huh...huh...(tears, gasps for air, cries for momma)...sooooowwwwrryyyy. Christopher tried to argue with me that he hurt her and it was okay for her to punch him. That little asshole - wants to argue with me no matter. Okay, one more cuss for the night...the little motherfucker. I told him to zip it...this is about her and her behavior. I'm not putting up with her shit. Okay...I gotta quit. I'm gonna have to go to confession for my sailor's mouth!

Anyway, raise your kids to be assholes...I don't care. I don't have to put up with it in my house and I'm not going to put up with it after tomorrow. I need to pray for a cleaner tongue in my head and for the right words to say. I don't want to say something in anger. I need to be clear-headed and do the right thing. I keep wondering...am I supposed to let her into our home. What's the right thing to do here? Am I letting the devil into my heart when I want to say...Lisa, I'm sorry that a shelter sounds like a better option than living with Jacob, but we need you to gather your stuff and leave. Please call us when you have an address or find a shelter. Good luck. Is she betting that we let her stay because of the kids? I don't know if I can take her kids for another week? Is that where I'm failing? Should we let her stay because of the kids. Ugh...I hate it and you know what...I understand Michele, but I want to tell Lisa that she can easily choose Jacob over a shelter and this is her choice.

$$.

So, I got this recommendation about a website for students/adults to get recommendations for books. It's like Borders built a site all about you...goodreads.com. I need to navigate it before I totally get it. Plus, I haven't listed all of my books. I better not get some crappy recommendations just because I went through that darn Stephen King phase. Anywho...


My sister in law is coming tomorrow. I want to tell David that his sister is a scam artist and she's shaking him down for money. I want to tell him to tell her to get the hell off my lawn and don't let the door hit you in the a** on the way out. I want to tell him a lot of things...but I won't. I want him to recognize that my family through ugly times and good times - they love our children more than they love me :). They will always help us out in ANY form the can. That my parents are going to need us when hit advanced ages. I want David to realize that we do for each other because they do for us. It'll never be about

Father's Day and more unexpected news

So, I logged into work email and found out three of our four students passed the GED and to be fair one girl was taken out of GED because was removed from pod and put on a pod that didn't allow her to attend my class. She said she was struggling with math and that's the subject she failed. It was a consequence of her decisions and actions that resulted in her removal, but I feel for the kid. I seriously doubt, however, that a few months in my class can take a student with 4th grade math skills to passing the GED...it's a WHOLE lot of info to cover in a short amount of time and a person doesn't just pick it up. It's like this class is a refresher. You may have learned it in the 8th or 9Th grade and you've forgotten it but you knew it at one point.

Anyway, I've decided that the minute Bryan and Christopher start arguing they are going to be banned from playing together. Today, Bryan started to throw a pouting fit and I yanked him up by his shirt collar and yelled at him. Scared the hell out of him and me too. I HATE when I get mad at Bryan like that. It's not good for him and it just makes me feel bad. I think I'm PMSing and yes, I think some months are worse than others and yes, it makes me angry.


It doesn't help that I found out today that David's sister WON'T be back for at least two more weeks. She said that her ex took the baby and won't give her back. My first question is Why did he have the baby in the first place? When she got the baby back after the last court deal - the baby's throat was so infected the baby could hardly swallow and had to get her medicine etc. WHAT in the hell is she doing letting him take the baby for a few days before she leaves? I won't say this to David, BUT I WILL BET ANYTHING that she wanted to take a few days to go party and say good-bye to all of her friends and then she couldn't find the loser SOB of a dad and then she was in a tough spot OR she wasn't ready to come back so quick so she told him to take her for however many days and it wasn't when she was due to leave so she makes up the story to cover her arse.

When she called David, she was acting all put out like nobody is willing to help her. David was like WTH are you talking about? Jacob is paying for you to fly back and forth for your kid to deal with a custody issue that SHOULD HAVE BEEN DEALT WITH BEFORE YOU LEFT...but ya didn't so he's now paying $400 to fly you back and David's Aunt is bending over backwards to help her reschedule her flight. All of these people are trying to help and she's mad because she's not getting what SHE WANTS. whatever! She was mad because her boyfriend hadn't reloaded a pre-paid debit card for her to use while she was out in CA but instead sent the money to his mom's house where she's out there. David pointed out that she didn't have an address to mail the money to and that's where she currently is and the poor guy was in the process of setting up direct deposit with this company and took a few days. He LITERALLY just started working with this company. She's mad because her mom doesn't have money to give her or won't give her. Another aunt of hers told her that she wouldn't give her money because she disagreed with her lifestyle. Oh, but you have to know that D's sister called one of their aunts and asked her for money from her will because at their grandmother's funeral the aunt mentioned that she wanted to leave some money to her. So D's sister calls the aunt to tell her that she's in the processing of moving to CO and wanted to see if she would give her the money now that the aunt mentioned leaving to her. When the aunt told her no, D's sister started to argue with her about it. David was like...it's her money...you don't have a right to ask her for it.

I feel like I'm talking about a drug addict. When I try to describe her to my parents, I don't know HOW to explain her b.s. and you have to know that it's all b.s. It's like this selfishness. David wants to help her, but he really doesn't want that crud in our life. He's freaking out. I told David that it's his turn to lose it...I'm calm. What his sister doesn't realize is that if she thinks she's going to come and live off of us she's totally high. If she stays here longer than a week, I'm going to introduce her to Carl Arnold. She hasn't met my family. They will get you employment...my mother and father are the king and queen of nags and helpers. If you're around them for any length of time...oh, you're in for it. You will be going to school and working before you know it. About two blocks from our house is Del Taco, Wal-Mart, Taco Bell and across Powers is Wendy's. I don't care if she has to work three jobs to make it full-time, but she has no excuse about not working. Every time I pull up to Wendy's or Del Taco...there's a new Now Hiring sign. I know the economy sucks, but there's work - even if it's flipping burgers she can get off her ass and go to to work. There's a day care right off of galley that stays open until 6pm and you can get discounts for day care if you're on welfare etc...and you know his sister is on welfare so guess what...between my parents, me and the day care center she'll have PLENTY of babysitters available...so no excuses little girl...get off yer arse and find an f'n job. Plus, she has a vehicle. It sucks, but it runs. Anyway, I'm hoping she leaves soon after arrival, but she was already opening the door about how people keep saying she should just stay with her brother, but she doesn't want to screw that up. David said, he's not saying one word to her. He doesn't want her to think that there's an opening for her to move in.

Ugh, I'm done...two more weeks. We'll see.

GED

Well, one of my co-workers who handles the transition services for the school forgot to register the kids for the GED test. I wouldn't know it other than the fact the counselors noted it in their meeting notes how the school didn't register them so this other lady had to. It's embarrassing when we drop the ball because they like to send out their notes to EVERYONE. They NEVER GET our emails but the minute we forget something - here's the spotlight to shine on it.

I'm sure Dan will not be happy but we'll see how big a deal the director makes/made over this...in other words; let's see how much of a sh** storm will rain down on on our boss? It may be only a sprinkle but the wording in the meeting notes was obviously snide.

So looking forward for the next two weeks to FLY BY!!